If your teen is in immediate danger, call 911. For free, 24/7 support, call or text 988, or chat at 988lifeline.org. You can also text HOME to 741741 to reach the Crisis Text Line.
Suicide is preventable. Most teens who think about suicide give signs, and the adults around them can make a difference. Notice the signs, ask directly, stay with your teen, make your home safer, and connect them with a mental health professional.
September is Suicide Prevention Month, and the topic matters all year. This guide is for parents and caregivers of teens and young adults. It covers warning signs, risk factors, what to say and do, how to make your home safer, and how treatment helps.
How common is it?
According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, suicide is the second leading cause of death for people ages 10 to 24 in the United States. Many more young people think about suicide than die by it. Thoughts of suicide are a sign of deep pain. They respond to support and treatment.
Warning signs to take seriously
Take every one of these seriously. Trust your gut if something seems off.
What your teen says
- “I wish I weren’t here,” “I wish I could go to sleep and not wake up,” or “You won’t have to worry about me much longer”
- Feeling hopeless, trapped, or like a burden
- Talking or writing about death, or about wanting to hurt themselves
What your teen does
- Pulling away from friends, family, and activities they used to enjoy
- Giving away prized belongings or saying goodbye in unusual ways
- Using more alcohol or drugs
- Taking more risks
- Searching online for ways to hurt themselves
- A sudden calm after a long period of distress
What you notice in mood, sleep, and school
- Constant sadness, anxiety, irritability, or anger
- Big changes in sleep or appetite
- Dropping grades or quitting sports and clubs
Cyndi Marquez, one of our therapists, explains that depression in teens often shows up as irritability. It is easy to write off as hormones. She encourages parents to look for withdrawal, loss of interest, and changes in sleep, eating, or grades, and to stay curious. You see your teen every day, and you will notice a change.
Risk factors and protective factors
No single cause leads to suicide. Risk builds when several factors add up. Common risk factors include:
- Depression, anxiety, or another mental health condition
- A previous suicide attempt or self-harm
- Alcohol or drug use
- Trauma, abuse, or the loss of a loved one
- Bullying or harassment, including online
- Family conflict, a parent’s separation, or a recent major loss
- Rejection or stigma tied to identity. LGBTQ+ youth face higher risk when they lack support. See our guides for LGBTQ+ teens and transgender teens.
- Access to firearms or large amounts of medication at home
Protective factors lower the risk:
- A close, open relationship with at least one caring adult
- Friends and a sense of belonging at school or in the community
- Coping and problem-solving skills
- Access to mental health care
- Reasons for living, such as family, goals, faith, or pets
What to do if you are worried
- Stay calm and find a private moment. Your calm helps your teen feel safe.
- Ask directly. Say, “Are you thinking about suicide?” Asking does not plant the idea. It shows you care and gives your teen permission to be honest.
- Listen without judgment. Let your teen talk. Avoid lectures and quick fixes. Try: “Thank you for telling me. I’m here, and we’ll get through this together.”
- Do not promise to keep it secret. Explain that you will get them help because you love them.
- Stay with them. If they are in immediate danger, do not leave them alone. Call 911 or 988.
- Get professional help right away. Contact a therapist, your pediatrician, or the school counselor. Your teen’s doctor can also guide you to urgent care.
Our guide on how to talk to someone you are worried about includes more ways to open the conversation.
Make your home safer
Many suicidal crises pass quickly. Limiting access to means gives your teen time. Experts recommend these steps for any home with a teen who is struggling:
- Store firearms unloaded and locked, with ammunition locked separately. The safest choice is to keep them out of the home while your teen is in crisis.
- Lock up prescription and over-the-counter medications, and keep only small amounts on hand.
- Secure alcohol and any other substances.
- Ask other families whose homes your teen visits to do the same.
How treatment helps
Therapy works. A therapist can assess your teen’s safety, treat depression, anxiety, or trauma, and teach skills to ride out painful moments. Evidence-based approaches such as cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) are common. Many teens also work with a therapist to build a written safety plan. The plan lists warning signs, coping steps, people to call, and ways to keep the environment safe.
A psychiatrist or pediatrician can discuss medication when it fits. Follow through on every referral, and stay involved after the crisis passes. Risk can stay higher in the weeks and months after a crisis, so keep checking in.
How schools and communities can help
- Staff trained to spot warning signs and refer students quickly
- A clear plan for responding to a student in crisis
- Peer support programs and safe adults students can approach
- Clear information about 988 and local resources
Tell your teen’s school counselor about your concerns. The school can watch for changes and support your teen during the day.
Frequently asked questions
Will asking my teen about suicide put the idea in their head?
No. Research shows that asking directly does not raise the risk. It often brings relief, because your teen no longer carries the secret alone.
Is my teen just seeking attention?
Treat every statement about suicide as serious. A teen who reaches out, even in a hint, is asking for help.
What if my teen refuses to talk to me or to a therapist?
Keep showing up. Offer other trusted adults, such as a relative, coach, doctor, or school counselor. Many teens open up to a therapist more easily than to a parent. If you believe your teen is in danger, act now. Call 988 or take them to the nearest emergency room.
Does one cause lead to suicide?
No. Suicide has many causes, and no single event explains it. Your teen’s struggles are not your fault, and getting help is the right step.
What should I do after a teen shares suicidal thoughts?
Stay close, remove or lock up means, and connect your teen with a mental health professional within days. Keep appointments, and keep checking in. Support from family helps recovery.
Support from Dayrise Wellness
Dayrise therapists support teens, young adults, and families through depression, suicidal thoughts, trauma, and life transitions. We use evidence-based approaches such as CBT, DBT, and trauma-informed care. We see clients at our Lombard and Naperville offices. We are in-network with BlueCross BlueShield PPO, United Healthcare PPO, and Aetna PPO.
If you are worried about your teen, you do not have to work it out alone. Contact us to book a first session. If your teen is in crisis right now, call or text 988.